Lemon Stealing Neighbors

The other day I was walking to my bedroom from the bathroom after just having taken a shower, when I see a man lurking around my yard. My home and yard are set a bit differently than most, making this occurance both more possible and more disturbing. First of all, the house is rather dark and gets very little direct sunlight. There is a sort of enclosed pation in the center of the house, which can not be seen form the street or the neighboring houses. So, there are no curtains or other type of shades on the windows that look into this patio. Hence, if there is someone in my yard, they can see right in.

The other odd thing about the house is that there really isn't a back yard. The yard is rather large, but it's all in the front. There is a wall that goes around a lare portion of the ayrd. To me and my family, this wall designates public sapce from private space. Outside the wall is open to the neighbors and filled with decorative plants species; inside the wall is a more private, secured area and has mostly fruit trees and vegetable gardens. It is, in spirit, our backyard.

Now, at the time I saw the man lurking in my front-backyard, I didn't have any clothes on, so the alarm I would normally feel was heightened. I hid in the hallway and peeked out the window and patio to see who this person was. Well, lo-and-behold, it was my neighbor. He had come to take a few lemons off my tree.

Now, taking a few lemons and here there really isn't a problem. During peak seasons I give them away by the bagful. The issue here really isn't about the lemons. The issue is my privacy and respect for property that doesn't belong to him.

So, now I was in a predicament.He had behaved innapropriately, yet I was the one who had to deal with it. I have mentioned neighborly isuses to him before and he has responded by blowing them off. Nothing major. But these neighbors are a certain type of people. I don't know how to describe it, but I strongly suspected that if I went and approached them about, they would suddenly see me as the bad guy here. They are like the guy with TB who says "Oh poor me, I would never wish this on anyone," but in the mean time he has exposed hundred of people in his selfish and egocentric antics.

Anyway, here are my options, in the order I thought of them:

1. March myself over, knock on the door and say to the man, "I saw you taking lemons off my tree, and I'd really appreciate it if you would ask before taking lemons next time." The problem here is that suddenl; I would be the "uptight bitch" and probably case neighborly drama that I really don't want.

2. March myself into their backyard and spend an afternoon in their pool. When they come home and ask me what I'm doing I'll just say, "Well, no one was using it, and I thoght neighbors shared. I mean, you help yourself to my lemons." This is not my style, though I wish it was.

3. Write a note to the man saying the same thing as #1. Same problems as #1, plus I will be seen as passive agressive.

4. Approach the man's wife, when the man is not home, saying "I saw your man taking lemons off my tree, and I'd really appreciate it if you would tell him to before taking lemons next time. Becuase, well, when he came over, I was just out of the shower, and I was naked, and I felt really uncomfortable." I could play the naked card, but it that's not relaly the issue.

5. Drop the part about saying I saw them, and just throw out randomly, "Hey, if you want some fruit here and there it's geenrally not a problem, but you need to be sure to ask first, uot of respect for my privacy."

6. Leave note that says the same as #5, with a couple of lemons.

So, I am thinking if I see them I wil use #5, but if not, then I'll go with #6. Since I hardly ever see them, it will probably be #6.